2009 Elliot's Angels Video!

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1st Anniversary / One Heck of a Year

It has been one year since Elliot was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis. I was looking back at my thoughts in my journal and what kinds of things I was thinking about, and dealing with. It was a time that the future was unknown, scary and sometimes very dark. I have learned so much and I see such a bright future for our Elliot. I know that he is going to grow up to be some special man, husband, father, friend, and hopefully grandfather. I am posting my very first post about Elliot that I wrote on my other blog that I tried to start but was to hard. I am putting this up for my own peace, and accomplishment. We made it through the year with huge success, and all I can say is hallelujah! I know that my family has been so blessed this past year and know that we are being looked after at all times. This past year I have realized how important my little family is to me, they are my life, and soul. I am connected to them in ways that I never thought possible. I love you Mike, Lizzie, Charlie, and Elliot! You guys are my one true love in life, and you complete me. We are a family forever and I couldn't be any luckier.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 20, 2008

Elliot's News
As most of you know Elliot was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis on January 4th. It was quite a blow for our family and it took a bit for the shock to wear off. It is hard to be told that their is something wrong with your perfect baby. Elliot was tiny at birth at only 5lbs. But we all thought that he would grow. Well he didn't and so we started to worry. We eventually ended up at the Failure to Thrive Clinic up at Primary Children's Hospital to see if they could figure it out. So They naturally wanted to run some tests to rule out the worst. One of the tests was one for Cystic Fibrosis. The doctor said he was sure that he did have it but it would be good to rule it out. After we left the hospital Mike and I went to lunch and look up on the internet about CF. We both quickly decided that we didn't want that disease and we were sure Elliot didn't have it. How silly of us to just assume we knew more than the docs. The next day Elliot and I went and did the tests and didn't think anything of it. I went back to my moms house and spent the rest of the day with my sister who was leaving to go back home with her family to Kansas. That night we got home late, around 8:30 and Mike and I were in different cars. Lizzie and Elliot were with me and Charlie was with Mike. I got home first and checked our messages. I think we only had one, I can't remember the night to clearly. I just remember listening to the Message from Dr. Jackson. (Ahh, just thinking about this night still makes me cry, I can barely read the screen right now.) He said that he has the test results from today and that he needs to speak to us immediately and that he will keep on calling us until he could reach us and that we should call him on his cell phone until we reach him. My stomach just dropped and I called him. I don't remember really what he said except that the test was positive for CF and that we need to treat him right away.. He told me that the doctor that is over the CF clinic up at Primary wanted him to be admitted that night. I remember just falling to the floor. That is about the time that Mike walked in with Charlie. He quickly pick up the other phone and started to listen. I am so lucky to have him, he has been the rock through the whole thing. He seems to remember most of the conversation with the doc. We decided to not admit him that night and wait until Monday, and try to do it as an out patient deal. It was a long weekend. That night we decided to bless Elliot that Sunday. I called a few people that night to let them know the news mainly family, and some close friends. (Thank you Brooke for crying with me). I didn't get much sleep that night as you can imagine just thinking of what was in store for me and my family especially Elliot. The next morning I started to take down Christmas, so that we would be ready for the blessing. Pretty solemn morning. That afternoon I went with Lizzie, Mom, and Brooke out to find a blessing outfit for him. That ended up to be a bit tricky, most babies a lot bigger than 5.5lbs when they are blessed. When we would ask if they had any smaller sizes they looked at kinda funny and asked why I don't just wait until he is a couple of months, he would fit in them by the time he is 2 or 3 month old. All I wanted to do is just shake them and yell at them, my baby is sick and small all I want is to bless him can't you just help me with that... Silly I know. But we ended up finding one that fit him perfectly and as you can see he looked very cute in it. That night we went to La Frontera for dinner with my Dad, Mom, and Grandma Beth. It was nice to be with family, it didn't hurt as much when I was with them. That night I got more sleep. We woke up and went to church. It was fast Sunday. We got home from church and I was totally exhausted so I took a nap. Mike ended up cleaning the house and getting it ready for that night. (thank you love). Everyone came over at 7pm, and so did Bishop Brad Romney. He conducted the meeting, and was so sweet. He was the one that started the fountain of tears. After he got teary eyed everyone seemed to join in. What a special sweet man. Thank you Bishop Romney for your sweet words and spirit. Mike then gave him his name and then blessed him. It was just beautiful. My children are lucky to have such a wonderful father. After the blessing Mike gave one to me, and then he received one from his father. Then we told anyone that if they wanted to say anything or ask us anything that the floor was open. All I can say is that I know that me and my family are so loved. I felt it that night and I still do today. Our families are so great, they are supportive and understanding with unconditional love. Thank you. Even our family that is away. I can feel it from Kansas too. We are so so blessed.
Well it is getting late and I need some sleep, I will try to post more tomorrow.
Good night!

Happy Birthday Elliot!

Today we are celebrating Elliot's 1st Birthday. Wow, what a year. It has gone by so fast and yet if I think about each day it has been the longest year and days in my life. I have felt so many emotions, good and bad, happy, excited, overjoyed, sad, concerned, desperate, depressed, alone, and heartbroken. All of these are all so familiar. When I was making this slide show, I couldn't help but get sucked in to each emotion I felt at the time each picture was taken. Tears would fall, then I would be laughing out loud. I love Elliot so much and he is such a blessing in my life. It is so hard to put it into words how he has changed me. I feel like a different person, I look at life so differently, some of you might know how I feel. Living life knowing that your child isn't going to have a normal life, knowing that he will be sick about half the year, torturing him every morning and night by doing his therapy in hopes that it will prolong his life. Keeping me up at night thinking about hearing the rasp in his voice, or the difficulty of breathing at night. It breaks my heart. Going to doctor appointments and getting bad news, or being told that he isn't growing. Having a G-tube threat hanging over my head. It hits you like a Semi going full speed. Don't get me wrong I wouldn't change him for the world, it is just so hard. I feel like I am Fanny in "Fanny's Dream." It is a children's book, that I love. Her life isn't quite the way that I dreamed it would be, but the life that she got she would change it even when her Fairy Godmother said that she would. She loved short little Herby and wouldn't want her life any other way. I feel that same way, I have 3 beautiful children, a caring loving, and patient husband, a very supportive family, a good home, wonderful neighbors, great ward, and perfect friends. What more could I ask for?
This is suppose to be a post about Elliot, so here goes...... Elliot is such a happy little boy, and loves life. You won't find ones that is better natured. He loves his big sister and brother, and tries to be just like them. He loves to sing, and play with cars. He gets into everything and is great at making messes. He took 3 steps this morning before breakfast. He loves to eat sweet things, and has 2 new sweet little teeth that just broke through last week. He can say moma, dada, thank you, and a-ohh. He loves to try and mimic what we say, and is great at yelling as loud as he can to get our attention. Happy Birthday sweet boy! Moma loves you so much.

TRIPLED HIS WEIGHT! WAY TO GO BUDDY!

I would like to announce that Elliot has now tripled his birth weight! Hooray for Elliot. It has been a long time coming, but he finally did it. We went in for a check up with Dr. Jesse the other day, and I was so pleased with how well Elliot is growing. Whenever we come in and weigh Elliot all the nurses that are around come cheer him on. They are so cute and say little things like, "Think heavy thoughts", or "Sit hard little buddy." I always tell them our goal for the month, which this month was 15lbs. So far we haven't made our goals, but this month we did. As he sat on the scale and we were waiting for the final numbers to show up, I was holding my breath and crossing my fingers, eyes, legs, whatever I could, and it came out to be 15 lbs even. We all cheered for him. I am sure that the people in the waiting room were thinking some crazies were in the back room. We were all so excited. I also have felt so relieved since we was weighed. It is nice to know that were are doing at least something right. It has been hard worrying about him all of the time, which I still do, but not to the point that I get a pit in my stomach anymore. Life is starting to get to a normal. I can't say back to normal, but our life schedule is becoming a normal for us, I guess a good word is comfortable. Mornings are crazy though, trying to get Elliot's therapy done, while getting Lizzie and Charlie ready for school. Wow, by 10am I am ready to take a nap with Elliot. I just wanted to share that we are doing great, and are happy and healthy! Or little CF boy is starting to grow and that makes the rest of us overflowing with joy! Oh yes I also wanted to say that Elliot took him first step yesterday. He is so funny looking standing there so small, but you gotta love it!